Today’s Jam

I dabbed on a few ideas to post here, but decided to go with something that matched my mood. What better way to help someone connect, than with words AND music. So I decided I won’t make the lists too long for you, but when I have these days where I can’t decide what to work on and have nit picked at many different things, just to post a playlist. I think it just could offer someone an excellent writing prompt. Just sit back and space out.


I spaced for the first hour or so working on a wood burn project.

papa woodburn

I am making this for my Papa who lives in Arizona. I discovered today that I really have a hard time mourning someone. His wife, my Nana, passed away over a year ago and I couldn’t fly out to the funeral from Connecticut. I can’t lie, Nana was my favorite person. I always smiled when I thought of her. Some of my favorite memories of her are: singing ‘Over The Rainbow’ when I was probably three years old, having sleepovers and tea parties, how she loved to laugh, her red hair, and her dedication to her faith. I also remember the day she told me not to cry when she left for Utah and I promised but couldn’t help it and I cried out for her to not go.

We wrote letters for years back and forth and then I became a not so social girl and the letters were sent less and less. I talked to her maybe a few times a year on the phone, but I didn’t even call her when was dying. I was so afraid and upset, I didn’t want to deal with it.

I still cry when I think of her and I always hope she knows how much I love and miss her.

So I didn’t get too far in this project today because I kept crying and couldn’t see what I was doing. So, I went and stared at a few RP documents yet to be posted and in process for Shadows Of The Forgotten. Camila and I have both mentioned it before, but there’s the link if you are interested.

I went to refresh youtube and it gave me this error message, clearly prompting me that high trained monkeys were dispatched to take care of the problem. Um...o.o Camila..oh wait she’s not here to rant about Google and cleverbot taking over and their smart monkeys. Wasn’t this how Planet Of The Apes started?

I am also sure Camila would be saying how she wants a monkey and now I remember this:

I saw Dane live in Boston. It was recorded for the HBO special and it was a late birthday gift for me by my folks because that is all I wanted. I had nose bleed seats but didn’t care. Fortunately, our entire row was randomly sent to customer care to relocate our seats CLOSER to the stage and this was due to the many video cameras in front of us. Awesome. Just had to share that. >.>



You’re welcome.


DISTRACTION. Now back to my daily jam.

This made me think of Jake, one of Camila’s characters in the RP. We’ve talked a bunch about Ess and Luckas, but we should show you folks some of Jake and Ess. We started writing together flashbacks for these friends and built a history for our characters that   we couldn’t even post until what..a year or so later. When I first stepped into the story that was already months in progress, they never interacted until they were reunited. Hmm, maybe I can find a short scene.. Haha yea right we write  chapters for a scene…but I’m sure there’s something…




…was the first theme I had on my writing playlist. I think, it perfectly depicts this friendship’s journey and if you read more later on, you’ll understand why.

Ess had reached the cemetery, not seeing Jake anywhere. She did see Jess speaking to someone paying their respects as she turned, making a bee line directly for the Oak by the market. She knew it was one of  the three places Jake would be. Still in her disguise she saw Jake leaning against the tree, appearing quite soaked from the current rain. Pulling the hood down tighter, she approached Jake slowly, unsure what to say to the boy. She let her facade fade back to her normal features as the boy looked up at her from underneath the partial shelter of the Oak. Ess kept silent, moving to Jake’s side, she sat beside him, leaning her head onto his shoulder. She would sit forever in silence if need be, whatever Jake needed. She waited to see if he would speak.

Jake was shivering a little bit from the rain and the cold, but he was mostly numb. His father was barely ever present in his life, but knowing that he was no longer present anywhere was somewhat… Terrifying, for the young boy. He barely noticed the footsteps approaching him and even as he looked up at his friend, he was unable to show the same joy he usually did every time he saw her, even though he was glad that she was there.

When Ess sat next to him and leaned her head on his shoulder Jake leaned against the girl, heaving a shaky sigh, and was quiet for a few moments, motionless aside from an occasional shiver. After a while he spoke. “Ess… I don’t know if I still want to be a Knight.” He mumbled. “What if I die like my dad? I don’t want Jess to be alone.” He let out a small sob as he whispered. “Does that make me a coward?”

Essence wrapped her arms around the boy, using her ‘borrowed’ cloak to surround them both from the rain and chill. “I don’t want you to die either Jake…” She whispered, a single tear streaking her cheek. Comfortingly Ess ran her fingers through Jake’s wet hair, her body was warmer than his and was trying to get him to stop shivering.

“You…” Ess grabbed Jake’s chin, forcing gently him to look into her eyes. “ Are…NOT a coward Jake. You are the bravest boy I know, more than any man I have ever met…”She sighed, her lips pressing firmly against the boy’s forehead. “We are going to protect each other Jake, remember? I promise to let nothing happen to you.”

Essence was reminded of the day she lost her father and her brother, and the pain inside her chest of that loss came rushing back, seeing her best friend suffering as she once had. She was going to be strong for him, just as he had been for her all those times. For the first time, she admitted to herself that she loved Jake very much. He was something to live for and she would take care of him forever if she needed to.

“Sometimes Jake, the greatest love for another is shown by sacrificing your life…your soul for the greater good. For what you believe in. Doesn’t mean you are not allowed to be scared. No one wants to die Jake, but everything comes to an end, eventually.”

Jake shuddered a bit more, even under the cloak, but it had little to do with the cold now and more to with holding back tears. He snuggled as close to Ess as he could, both for comfort and for warmth, as he listened carefully and quietly to her words. He was finally beginning to feel the cold, but he didn’t want to leave that spot, not quite yet.

After a bit he broke the silence with: “They called him a hero. I don’t know what they mean by that. I don’t think they know either.” He sighed softly, letting out a little bit of anger for having so many strangers patting him on the back all day. “So… If someone dies, they don’t… Stop loving you?” He asked, absently, trying to make sense out of what Ess had told him; he wasn’t sure he understood all of it. “So they don’t really leave you either, right?”

After going silent for a few moments more he looked up at his friend and gave her a faint smile. “I’m glad you’re here Ess. I promise I’ll keep being brave for you. Forever and ever.” He said nodding in agreement to his own words. “And even if I do die one day I won’t really leave you, because you’re my best friend, and I love you.”

Ess’s fingers never stopped twiddling with Jakes’ hair as she spoke, “Jacob..”She said for the first time, her tone serious, yet her voice remained gentle and sweet. “…Your father died…fighting for what he believed in….That made him a hero.” Ess gave a deep sigh, silent tears streaking her face, mixing with the rain it wasn’t very noticeable.

“I’d like to believe those who pass away, never leave us, because we always remember them. Yes Jake, just because someone died, doesn’t mean they stopped loving you.” Ess snuggled her face into Jake’s wet hair, keeping her breaths even as she kept her composure for her young friend. She was swelling with a feeling she didn’t understand at Jake’s words. As much as she felt the same, she just couldn’t bring herself to say it back. Ess was happy she was able to be there for Jake, and instead of saying she loved him back, she responded, “I would give my life for you my friend.”


This is the lullaby Ess Sings to Jake at one point and ends up being quite important later on to her story. Was not planned, but worked out nicely.

I recently discovered a book on Amazon where the author posted a list of songs for each chapter or pertinent scene. Love the author for that. More people should do that as it gives another view to the scene, added depth, or just a peek into the mind of the author when writing it.

4 thoughts on “Today’s Jam

  1. Pingback: Sharing A Smile or Two… | A Foggy Realm of Reality

  2. First: wow. 2nd: wow. 3rd:…..
    I really enjoy your writing. You are deep. Not usual in a fiction sense- most are as shallow as the puddle from hot adternoons rainfall;). To add, I’m not normally drawn to fiction. I have been a non-fiction reader most of ny adult life anyway (hmm). But you have a gift of engaging your reader through an encouragement of questions of your ponderings. This is quiet delightful for me, especially for one who craves answers through knowledge. Last, putting song, video to your words for further artistist awestruckness works!! …..on my heart anyway. I actually sense a connection to these characters!! Whatever you call it here, you’ve developed a personal style of presenting thought that must be acknkowledged and recognized and continued!

    Bravo my friend, bravo.

    Now let’s talk about that dream…..;)!!

    Much love,

    P.S. My dsys sre dliwly being filled with income earning needs. I appologize for my lag in responding to your Blog.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Aww, thank you for taking the time out of your day to comment and let me know I caught your attention! ^.^ I am happy to hear that you can connect to Camila and I’s characters as was quite the intention. Of course the above bit I posted is out of context, but I thought the message was quite clear. New age classical music is my favorite for writing now a days. Since so much of it is used for games and movies and has a life all it’s own (i feel), I have deemed it just EPIC MUSIC because that is what comes from listening to it. In the future please don’t hesitate to drop a line. I always want to hear feedback, even if it isn’t in praise. How else are we to grow as people, right? Thanks again, from Camila and Me!


  3. Pingback: The Things We Do For Family | Blackbird's Nest

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