I’ve been rewriting my first chapter and cutting off some things from my book. Maybe I should have waited to do this later, but I just can’t relax knowing stuff is all messy. Fuck my life.
Made the mistake of putting the first three lines up for critique on AbsoluteWrite. It’s not that that people were mean or I got bad advice; much on the contrary, everyone was pretty nice and incredibly helpful, but now my head is a flipping mess of advice.
I’m at a point of my development as a writer that if I focus on what’s technically wrong with my writing it dulls the voices, I don’t feel the characters, and the writing doesn’t flow. If I don’t think about it at all, when I read back I see that there’s a lot wrong with the stuff I wrote. Even if I can’t identify what; I know it’s there and it bothers me that it’s there. So that kind of sucks.
That’s why I was up all night watching Revenge and telling myself I’m not going to touch the novel until the post-feedback paranoia goes away so I can feel my character’s voice again. I’m going to read and catch up on shows… Once Upon a Time is probably next after Revenge and I have yet to watch The Walking Dead… I need to stop and distract myself with things that are fun and then writing will be fun again and not frustrating.
It’s all a part of the process. Just have to keep learning and working and learning…