With Friends Like These…

Hey guys.

I know I said ‘see you on Monday’ and this is my second post since then, but my headache actually got better, so… Yeah. ^.^

Remember my friend from China? Her name is Fernanda. There. Now I don’t have to call her ‘my friend from China’ anymore. Nanda, as we call her, and I have been in an email argument ever since my first rant about Twilight and Fifty Shades. Waaay back when I started this blog. We have fun with this and it’s not in any way hostile, buuut… Now I think instead of trying to get me to reconsider my hatred for these particular works of fiction… She’s actively trying to murder me with them.

I’ll explain.

Despite our argument having originated with a blog post she has rarely visited this blog. Lately, however, she has. And she caught this bit of text I put on my ‘request a review’ post:

If you want to ask me to review 50 Shades of Grey (the movie or the book), The Twilight Saga (movies or Books), or Grey. Don’t unless you want me to suffer through these enough to gift me the books/movies. Because I’m not paying to torture myself. I haven’t reached those levels of masochistic behavior yet.

She then emailed me through the Nest’s contact form and said “I’ll gift you the Twilight Saga + Life and Death if you review them seriously on your blog.” She then imposed some conditions I’d have to meet in these reviews. I can write a single review for the Twilight Saga BUT she wants me to review Life and Death chapter by chapter. As an extra dare she said that if I can manage to record myself reading the chapters and review them orally she’ll actually pay me 50 Reais. See we had this game… “I’ll give you this much money if you do *certain embarrassing thing*” and she knows I’m currently trying to overcome my microphone shyness so that’s supposedly an incentive towards achieving that goal. Which is nice of her, sort of, all things considered. =_=

Now, here’s the thing. I had no fucking clue what Life and Death was, or that it even existed. So I was out today with my mom and we have two secret santas to buy gifts for, so we were at the mall looking at stuff and… I stopped by the bookstore and looked it up. I picked up this book and I wasn’t sure what it meant by ‘Twilight reimagined’ but it made my skin crawl. Then I opened it and I read what it was.

It’s a genderbent version of Twilight; you know, human boy and vampire chick.

I swear I screamed “NOOOOO” in the middle of the bookstore. This lady saw the book I was holding and started laughing so hard at my reaction that her husband had to drag her away to calm down. I was fucking mortified at the possibility of this even existing. WTF!

It’s a dare, and if you guys don’t know this; dares are my kryptonite. So I’m actually giving this some thought. I don’t know about doing reviews orally as I read the chapters because… Well… I’m not that great of a speaker, but maybe I can get Wifey to help me out and maybe I can have some fun with it. I need to practice being comfortable over a microphone and practice actually speaking in English as opposed to just writing. Wifey says I speak well, but you know… I don’t think so. >.>

If I tell my friend she can buy me the books I need to go through with the reviews. So I need to think this through, seeing as I never finished reading the Twilight saga due to how infuriated I became just reading the first book. Although I did laugh at it a bunch too. Like I said, I need to think this one through very carefully. Probably let the Holidays pass  before I make a decision.

What do you guys think; should I? o.O



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