I Don’t Like It When…

I don’t like it when people tell me I could learn to draw.

I constantly mention the fact that I can’t, and that I envy people who are really good at it… and that’s true. I admit, it’d be really nice to be able to draw my characters and not have to go through the hassle of trying to describe them as accurately as possible; I’m not that great at that either. >.>

And I don’t like that people mention that I could learn as if I had never considered it. I know that you can learn to draw. A lot of people take art classes and learn and improve and whatnot. The thing is, it’s not just that I’m not good at it, but I was so constantly pestered by arts teachers during my school years; one of them in particular during high school, that I just hate drawing. And they were shit teachers too, in my opinion, because I don’t recall one time when an arts teacher actually tried to help me improve the shit drawings I made, they just bothered me about it to a point where I started refusing to draw. I almost failed my last year of high school because I had an incredibly shit grade at arts…. Because I refused to do the work; and it was all drawing all the time.

And that was kind of embarrassing for me, because I was not the most organized student and I hated studying, but I was always fucking smart like hell. I’m not being arrogant with this, my grades in everything except arts, and at one point Spanish, were always above 90. I took pride in that. So that year, I had managed to get 100 in physics and chemistry; which were subjects I had struggled with before, but I was almost failing because I fucking refused to draw in art class.

*sigh*

Back to the point I was trying to make… I don’t get angry when people tell me this, in fact I appreciate the intent, but I still don’t like it. And it’s not like “oh, you should stop complaining you can’t draw then”, because I don’t. I’m not complaining. I just really admire people who are great at it, and I envy that talent in the same way I envy classical pianists even though I never once had half a thought to taking piano lessons in my life.

I learned to play guitar because that’s (sort of) what I wanted. I became a writer because that’s what I love. It doesn’t mean that I won’t appreciate, admire, or in some way envy people who are terrific at other instruments or other forms of art. And It’s a not a bitter envy either. I don’t resent the fact I can’t draw, or people who do. It’s just what it is and I accept that. It’s not a problem I’m trying to fix and that’s why it bugs me a little when people… You know… Try to fix it. 😛

B.B

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